SAINT PETERS Complaynt - by Robert Southwell:73-108/792

The borne-blind begger, for received sight,
Fast in his faith and love, to Christ remain'd,
Hee stouped to no feare, he feard no might: [75]
No change his choice: no threats his truth distain'd.
One wonder wrought him in his dutie sure:
I, after thousands did my Lord abjure.

Could servile feare of rendring nature's due,
Which growth in yeeres was shortly like to claime, [80]
So thrall my love, that I should thus eschue
A vowed death, and misse so faire an ayme?
Die, die, disloyall wretch, thy life detest:
For saving thine, thou hast forsworn the best.

Ah life, sweet drop, drownd in a sea of sowers, [85]
A flying good, posting to doubtfull end,
Still loosing months and yeeres to gaine new howers:
Faine, time to have, and spare, yet forst to spend;
Thy growth, decrease, a moment, all thou hast:
That gone, ere knowne: the rest: to come, or past. [90]

Ah! life, the maze of countlesse straying waies,
Open to erring steps, and strow'd with baits,
To winde weake sences into endlesse strayes,
A loose from vertues rough unbeaten straights;
A flower, a play, a blast, a shade, a dreame, [95]
A living death, a never-turning streame.

And could I rate so high a life so base?
Did feare with love cast so uneven account,
That for this goale I should runne Judas race,
And Caiphas rage in crueltie surmount? [100]
Yet they esteemed thirtie pence his price,
I, worse than both, for nought deny'd him thrise.

The mother sea from overflowing deepes,
Sends forth her issue by divided vaines:
Yet backe her of-spring to theyr mother creepes, [105]
To pay theyr purest streames with added gaines;
But I, that drunke the drops of heavenly flud,
Bemir'd the gyver with returning mud.

Notes

[ll73-78]: See Chapter 9 of St John's Gospel:

[1] And Jesus passing by, saw a man, who was blind from his birth: ...[14] Now it was the sabbath, when Jesus made the clay, and opened his eyes. [15] Again therefore the Pharisees asked him, how he had received his sight. But he said to them: He put clay upon my eyes, and I washed, and I see...[20] His parents answered them, and said: We know that this is our son, and that he was born blind:[21] But how he now seeth, we know not; or who hath opened his eyes, we know not: ask himself: he is of age, let him speak for himself. [22] These things his parents said, because they feared the Jews: for the Jews had already agreed among themselves, that if any man should confess him to be Christ, he should be put out of the synagogue...[23] Therefore did his parents say: He is of age, ask himself. [24] They therefore called the man again that had been blind, and said to him: Give glory to God. We know that this man is a sinner. [25] He said therefore to them: If he be a sinner, I know not: one thing I know, that whereas I was blind, now I see. [26] They said then to him: What did he to thee? How did he open thy eyes? [27] He answered them: I have told you already, and you have heard: why would you hear it again? will you also become his disciples? [28] They reviled him therefore, and said: Be thou his disciple; but we are the disciples of Moses. [29] We know that God spoke to Moses: but as to this man, we know not from whence he is. [30] The man answered, and said to them: Why, herein is a wonderful thing, that you know not from whence he is, and he hath opened my eyes.[31] Now we know that God doth not hear sinners: but if a man be a server of God, and doth his will, him he heareth. [32] From the beginning of the world it hath not been heard, that any man hath opened the eyes of one born blind. [33] Unless this man were of God, he could not do any thing. [34] They answered, and said to him: Thou wast wholly born in sins, and dost thou teach us? And they cast him out. [35] Jesus heard that they had cast him out: and when he had found him, he said to him: Dost thou believe in the Son of God?[36] He answered, and said: Who is he, Lord, that I may believe in him? [37] And Jesus said to him: Thou hast both seen him; and it is he that talketh with thee. [38] And he said: I believe, Lord. And falling down, he adored him

[l76] distain'd: to distain - To defile; to bring a blot or stain upon; to sully, dishonour.

[l79] natures due: death.

[l82] A vowed death:

[35] Peter saith to him: Yea, though I should die with thee, I will not deny thee. [Matthew 26]

[l85] sowers: sours. n. That which is sour, in literal or figurative senses. 1594   Shakespeare Lucrece sig. G1v   The sweets we wish for, turne to lothed sowrs . 

[l86] posting: to post - To ride, run, or travel with speed or haste; to hurry, make haste.

[l87] loosing: losing. howers: hours.

[ll88-90]: Observations on the fleeting nature of time. man may consider that he is fortunate in having in his life the gift of time, even with time to spare; but he is forced to spend the time that has been given to him. As the amount of allotted time passes (grows), the amount left decreases. All man can say that he has in his control is the present moment; that is gone in an instant, before it is known. Apart from the present moment, the rest of a man's allotted time is either past or still to come.

[l92] strow'd: strewn.

[l93] To winde: In immaterial sense: To turn or deflect in a certain direction; esp. to turn or lead (a person) according to one's will; 1586   A. Day Eng. Secretorie i. sig. Q1v   To admonish you..to his..timely looking to, to winde him from that.

[l93] strayes: stray, n. The action of straying or wandering.1608   Shakespeare King Lear i. 199   I would not from your loue make such a stray, To match you where I hate.

[l94] loose: n. A state or condition of looseness, laxity, or unrestraint; hence, free indulgence; unrestrained action or feeling; abandonment. Chiefly in phr. at (a or the) loose: in a state of laxity or freedom; unrestrained, unbridled, lax. to take a loose: to give oneself up to indulgence. The act of letting go or parting with something.

ll99 & 101] Judas...thirtie pence: 

[14] Then went one of the twelve, who was called Judas Iscariot, to the chief priests, [15] And said to them: What will you give me, and I will deliver him unto you? But they appointed him thirty pieces of silver. [Matthew 26]

[l102] then: than.

[l100] Caiphas: Once the death of Jesus had been agreed, the most unscrupulous means were employed in order to bring it about, and Caiphas is chiefly to blame.

[3] Then were gathered together the chief priests and ancients of the people into the court of the high priest, who was called Caiphas: [4] And they consulted together, that by subtilty they might apprehend Jesus, and put him to death. [Matthew 26]. 

The hill south of Jerusalem where this house is said by tradition to have stood is called the 'Hill of Evil Counsel'. As high-priest, Caiphas was the official head of the Sanhedrin, and consequently responsible for the travesty of a trial to which Christ was submitted by the Jewish authorities, before they handed Him over to Pilate and stirred up the people to demand his death.

[54] And Peter followed him from afar off, even into the court of the high priest; and he sat with the servants at the fire, and warmed himself. [55] And the chief priests and all the council sought for evidence against Jesus, that they might put him to death, and found none. [56] For many bore false witness against him, and their evidences were not agreeing. [57] And some rising up, bore false witness against him, saying: [58] We heard him say, I will destroy this temple made with hands, and within three days I will build another not made with hands. [59] And their witness did not agree. [60] And the high priest rising up in the midst, asked Jesus, saying: Answerest thou nothing to the things that are laid to thy charge by these men? [61] But he held his peace, and answered nothing. Again the high priest asked him, and said to him: Art thou the Christ the Son of the blessed God? [62] And Jesus said to him: I am. And you shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of the power of God, and coming with the clouds of heaven. [63] Then the high priest rending his garments, saith: What need we any further witnesses? [64] You have heard the blasphemy. What think you? Who all condemned him to be guilty of death. [65] And some began to spit on him, and to cover his face, and to buffet him, and to say unto him: Prophesy: and the servants struck him with the palms of their hands. [Mark 14]

[l104] vaines: veins. With reference or allusion to veins as channels for water . Obsolete. 1534   J. Fewterer tr. U. Pinder Myrrour Christes Passion f. cxxxv   What drynke..dyd he desyre, whiche is the founten of the lyuely and holsome water, the veyne of lyfe, the ryuer of all pleasure.

The image suggests water which, being drawn up and received in the heavens, is purified and returns to earth to feed into streams and rivers, replenishing its own source. A man's soul is similarly uplifted from the waters of Baptism and rises heavenwards. Whilst alive, a man is duty bound to make good use of this gift of supernatural life in his soul. In the parable of the talents, Our Lord makes clear in a vivid manner what happens to those who fail to do this and instead 'bemire the giver with returning mud':

[24] But he that had received the one talent, came and said: Lord, I know that thou art a hard man; thou reapest where thou hast not sown, and gatherest where thou hast not strewed. [25] And being afraid I went and hid thy talent in the earth: behold here thou hast that which is thine.

[26] And his lord answering, said to him: Wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that ... I should have received my own with interest. [28] Take ye away therefore the talent from him, and give it to him that hath ten talents. [29] For to every one that hath shall be given, and he shall abound: but from him that hath not, that also which he seemeth to have shall be taken away. [30] And the unprofitable servant cast ye out into the exterior darkness. There shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. [Matthew 25]